Being key in your partners life

You are like a key; your true fulfilment is in serving others by helping them unlock joy in specific areas of their life. Those “others” may be your partner, friends, family members, even strangers….You see, what may be a closed lock to your partner might be your chance to show how key you are in their life. It might be your opportunity to show how useful and valuable you are. And we all have areas where we are keys and areas where we are padlocks….though sometimes self-love and pride stops us from the discovery.

Love beyond self and humility is what you need to be a key to someone’s padlock, and to admit that in some areas you are a padlock in need of a key. But a proud person says “I know it all I need nothing….I can do it all by myself”….A self-loving person says…”What will I gain by helping you unlock that area of your life….how’s it my business?” Well…the irony is…it might actually be your business; you see, your value is in the discovery of the kind of locks you are able to help people unlock. For some their lock might be “Weight loss”…..for some their lock might be “Relationships”…for some…their lock might be “Finances”…for some their lock might be a simple haircut….Your value is in the discovery of the kind of lock you can open for people. And helping your partner discover what kind of key they are will surely add value to them and to you….because in helping them discover their usefulness…you’ve demonstrated your usefulness, you’ve been a key influence in their life…you’ve helped them open a locked area. Sometimes…we’re so blind to the most obvious things…it’s funny how we can see the parts of our bodies that are the furthest away from us like our arms…legs and so on…but we can barely see our nose, our lips without the help of a reflective surface…Sometimes we need to be a reflective surface for our partners. For instance you could have a guy who is great at cutting peoples hair…yet, he considers every other occupation under the sun as a means of livelihood except the very area where he’s a key in…he regards that area as just a hobby…<<<This guy needs help…and so do we all…We all need help to key in to specific areas of our life where we are keys, instead of crying about areas where we are padlocks, like…”Oh…I have no university degrees…I’m so dumb…all I can do is sing and make people happy and excited…but I’m so dumb”<<<this person wants to be a doctor, yet she’s able to unlock happiness for people by singing [Why?]. Sometimes, you find a person trying to be a key in an area where he or she is a padlock…Like a medical student trying to become a rapper because he likes the big houses rappers live in.

Whatever your case might have been..maybe you were laughed at in the past for inability to perform excellently in a particular area…leave that memory.  Whatever the case of your current partner might be…don’t laugh or look down on them because of areas where they are a padlock…no, rather love beyond self and help the unlocking of that closed area in their life. Every padlock has a key! The key could come in the form of reading a book…or talking to a person who has knowledge in that area. Having a padlock in your hands doesn’t mean you should become insecure…Don’t hide the padlock…No one benefits when you do that. Rather tackle it with your partner…by so doing…you give them a chance to feel good by helping you and a chance to gain more confidence in their key area…and you also benefit by having that area unlocked to you.

-Jeff Uguru
Dating Secrets
Copyright (c) 2010 Jeff Uguru

What you must know!

Christ Jesus is my God. A person is not a physical body, a person is the spirit/personality that lives in that physical body. It’s just like a car, the driver in the car is the one driving it. God is not a mystical fairy tale being, he is a person. He dwelt in the body called Jesus. That’s why Jesus was 100% man but also 100% God.

We are not all gods children. The child of a goat is a goat and the offspring of a lion is a lion cub. We are not all gods. To be created by god and to be born of god are different. But lets assume you are right, if we are all gods children then aren’t we gods? So why is it hard to think of a person as god? If Jesus was a man and we are all gods children then why is it hard to think of him as god?

To believe in Jesus is how you become born again, this second birth is not in the nature of the first Adam but in the nature of the second Adam which is Jesus. The nature of the first Adam was corrupted and so every other seed which came from him was likewise corrupted, hence why Jesus had to come from a different source (A virgin). If you consider that your DNA is simply information, you understand that Jesus was born of God and is called the “word” of God; the information of God, the DNA of God. And so those who are born again are born of this God DNA; they are born of the word of God. It makes sense that In the bible, they wanted to stone Jesus for saying he is the son of God, and he said to them, isn’t it written in your own books that God called the ones to whom his “word” came ‘gods’.

“Jesus answered them, Is it not written in your law, I said, You are gods? If he called them gods, to whom the word of God came….” (John 10:34)

Consider how a computer corrupted by a virus is potentially salvageable but if that computer refuses to be repaired then what choice does the owner have but to throw it away? Likewise, what choice is there for God when people refuse to be recreated, in choosing not to believe they themselves choose hell.

“Those who believe in him won’t be condemned. But those who don’t believe are already condemned because they don’t believe in God’s only Son.” (John 3:18)

It’s true that ignorance is bliss. But ignorance of the choice of being recreated is not bliss. The devil has power over those whom Jesus is not shepherd and Lord over. Jesus said “the devil comes to steal, kill and to destroy but I have come that they might have life and have it to the fullest.” Many think death is from God but God says death is an enemy to him, many think God afflicts them with bad things to teach them lessons but God says he is a good God, many think God does evil to them but God himself teaches that when your enemy slaps you on your right cheek you should turn the other one. Jesus called the religious leaders in his time hypocrites because they did not practice what they preached. The bible says God sends rain on both the just and the unjust. My point is this, even Gods enemy receives kindness from him. The devil is a liar, he confuses people and frustrates their efforts in life and blames God for it, Jesus said the devil was a liar and a murderer from the beginning.

And just so you know, no amount of self-righteous deeds will take a person to heaven, only faith in Jesus, by which you receive his own righteousness as a free gift, but this is another one of Satan arenas for lies, he deludes people into feeling unworthy of Gods goodness, but if its a gift you’re not supposed to be “worthy” of it. Righteousness is not in what you eat or in what you wear, it comes by belief. If you say its easy, then you have nothing to lose by exercising your belief right now and simply saying this “I declare with my mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in my heart that God raised him from the dead”. The bible says “If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved”, if you do not make the actual declaration with your mouth you can’t be saved because it says “with the heart man believes, unto salvation he confesses himself with his TONGUE”, many BELIEVE in Jesus but have never SAID SO with their TONGUE. It’s very simple.

Beauty and the Beast

A females rating is according to her beauty and body shape, a guys rating is not according to beauty..it’s according to his level of aggression. An 8, a 7, a 6…these are all levels of aggression for a male. Hence why when a guy gets more muscles and tattoos and scars he becomes more sexually appealing, his rating goes up. A 7 becomes a 7.5. But tattoos, scars and muscles don’t generally add value to a womans rating.

As beautiful as she is is as beastly as he has to be. Its truly beauty and the beast.

It has occurred to me for some time now that a male of a rating “7” cannot get females of a rating “8” or even “7.5”. There seems to be a fair exchange of aggression for beauty. A seven male will peak at level seven females. A seven male will generally not hang around males who are levels six or below. And seldom will a seven hang with males who are eights and remain a seven. Friendship can only truly be established between the levels as “master- servant” or “teacher- student”.

Things which communicate aggression: body shape, voice tone, facial hair and facial expression, injuries healed, blood, stories of dangerous situations conquered…these are tools for creating attraction with females.

How can a man genuinely increase his level of aggression? Exposing oneself to pain (for example by weight training), not shying away from situations which cause the stomach to feel fear….but instead feeling that fear and doing it regardless. These build aggression in a persons character!

Females are creations of beauty like flowers

You (females) are creatures of beauty, and we (men) are creatures of strength, if a man thinks you’re less beautiful than another woman, it’s like me saying mango is better than apple. Its an opinion, a preference. Like every fruit is good, I believe every woman is beautiful. So maybe my eyes see beauty when i look in your direction, maybe they don’t…is that a crime? So it doesn’t matter if or not reply to your message…also if I do think you’re beautiful and you tell me i’m out of your league….why condemn me if i want to get closer? Why block my path way with your insecurities? A thousand clicks just to find someone enough in my eyes to message..

You’re beautiful as you are, but you can obviously choose to believe it or not. When you do believe it, you’ll begin to think of ways to improve and present yourself better. It all begins with you truly believing it. I don’t think a guy can make you believe it, but if a guy is why you believe it then he can also be why you doubt it. You need to believe it because you know this simple truth, a woman is a creature of beauty. Knowing that sh*t will make your sexy ass ooze of sex appeal and even if a particular guy can’t see your beauty like another guy can…he’d still have to admit that you’ve got something about you.

If you can show me an ugly flower…then you ‘might’ be able to show me an ugly woman! I googled the worlds ugliest flower (try it) and it came up with a flower called “corpse flower (Amorphophallus titanum)” and they began the criticism by saying “It doesn’t look so bad”…

I believe that a woman is a walking breathing flower, think of how colorful you try to be (lipstick, eyeshadow etc), think of how you have seasons, men don’t have seasons but just like the leaves on a flower shed and fall… during your period you do the same. When was the last time you saw a guy pluck and insert a flower into his hair? A woman is like a flower. When you lose your virginity they say you’ve been deflowered. You would like to believe that when you do a number two in the toilet it smells like roses, but surely that’s one place where a woman is not like a flower! HAHAHA 😀 but hey…embrace the beauty inside you and it’ll radiate outside you…Big head!!!

Work And Passion

I need to love what i do. I have always been an excellent person. Its not my pursuit to be excellent, rather i obsess over what i love and consequently become excellent at it. Be it gymnastics, martial arts, writing, sex, seduction. When i fall in love with an art form, i do it and do it and hardly keep away from it because I am in-love. I am a passionate lover. And when I am with the object of my love…time flies by and escapes my attention. I fall because of it and I get up yet not in the least bit disheartened. Because I am inlove. My persistence is not because I am trying to gain fame or money or any such thing; I’m doing it because it feels good. I want to be good at it, I want it. This is how I learnt as a child to do things others could not. This is how i thrived as a teenager to excel where others were mediocre. Now as an adult all my childhood lovers have become wedded to me, now i do what i used to do for passion for glory, for fame, for success. It’s no longer for fun, it’s now a duty, its now my work. Sounds like marriage. 

I drag myself out of bed with the daunting thought of it on my mind. Yet sometimes when i do a perfect somersault i giggle like a child again. 

Although I’ve never being married I can understand how what was once romance becomes a chore. If i could pray for success, I would pray not to automatically wake up successful, rather I’d pray that God would make my old heart like it was in my youth, that hard-work may be what it was in my youth when i called it fun, that i might be obsessed like i once was, driven by passion and not by needs.

I don’t think it’s possible for our romance with the talents we’re given to last forever. I think what begins as interest grows into romance, and spending time together grows into a relationship, a dependency. Dedication to ones craft becomes what drives one, not just sweet emotions. Emotions rise and fall, but dedication is firmer. to build a dream on dedication is more stable than to build it on feelings. I guess love and work are ways we learn discipline and become stronger in our journey through life. I guess in love and in work there’s a transition from ‘love at first sight’ TO being productive and accomplishing great things with the one you love…so its like your love becomes bigger than just the two of you and it matures to involve others and improving the lives of others becomes the source of sweet emotions, thats how i see my relationship with my work and my female (when I choose one). Having said all this, I do childishly hope that romance between me and my work and/or woman can last forever!

 

-Jeff Uguru

How to make him fall inlove- Be to him a princess not a fire breathing dragon

If you say to a guy…”I love you with my whole heart” It won’t mean as much as if you say “I respect you with my whole heart”. And if a guy tells you “I respect you with my whole heart” what would that mean to you? But if he says “I love you with my whole heart” even if you were crying..a smile might flash across your face like a lightning bolt across the sky.

We often talk to others in the language we understand. Women speak LOVE instead of RESPECT (we appreciate it but respect is our “native tongue”) I’d rather be respected than loved instead of being loved and not respected, but i’d like to be respected for love not fear. When you speak respectfully you speak directly to a mans heart, and if he already likes you he’ll probably soon love you.

A guy (the ones I know) want to be able to lift up a womans spirit by telling her she’s beautiful, but then grow weary when the woman takes hearing such words for granted and loses interest. I feel as though men are out to conquer with their STRENGTH and women are out to conquer with their BEAUTY. Women show favour to a guy they perceive to be strong and men show favour to a woman they perceive to be beautiful. And wht is easily conquered isn’t as alluring/meaningful as what is a challenge to conquer.

Most women misunderstand what it means to be a CHALLENGE and instead they become CHALLENG-ING thinking its working to enchant a man. To be a challenge is to be difficult to obtain for reasons that may seem unfortunate and no specific persons fault, like the princess in a tower guarded by dragons and a wicked witch, she possibly would fall for the prince if he could just get through to her (so he thinks). But to be challenging is to be the dragon or that wicked witch.

A Woman is an obstacle course! In her seasonal nature and strange complexities a woman is a physical representation of challeneges that will cause a man to develop what it takes to make it in life. The desire to have her will cause a man to develop traits necessary for success. He’ll learn to exercise confidence, risk rejection, learn to learn what he doesn’t understand, learn to command situations, learn to man-up! Learn to be knocked down and get up a thousand times. Learn to be powerful. If a woman can consciously position herself as an obstacle course; she’ll make a guy go nuts for her. Be a challenge (elusive yet polite) but don’t be rude (uncultured and proud). Not sexy. Remember, be a princess not a dragon!

-Jeff Uguru

How does your body shape affect your attractiveness?

The balance between a man’s ability to (1) face danger, and (2) to run from danger affect his sexual attractiveness.

The overly muscular man may be able to face danger, but he is less able to run from it. This is because his stature reduces agility and athletic ability; the mating mind in the female finds him less sexually attractive for the reason that this inability reduces his ability to survive, and therefore his ability to protect his female.

The overly skinny guy may be able to run from danger, but his lack of muscles may reduce his ability to face it. However, the guy with the “swimmers build” also known as the “athletic build” is able to face danger and to run if need be. His physique will thus be more sexy and “reproductively attractive” to the mating mind because, as I always state, the mating mind obeys two programs given to it by God are (1) Stay alive (2) replicate life. Fighting is just one way of staying alive; running is the other way.

Watch video for more detail. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9XrJ76UTpiY
Download audio to listen further. : http://soundcloud.com/xycommunication/
how-does-your-body-shape

A man is designed to be both a tender and a keeper to a female. A man’s soft body is less sexually attractive than a man’s hard body. The reason being that a hard cover protects a book better than a soft cover; this same logic applies to the mating minds selection of males. To tend as I have mentioned in previous blogs means to nurture and a form of nurturing is comforting. The tender side (X) of a male is designed to comfort. The female being a tender-tender (XX) comforts a male. Even her body parts are designed with a cushiony effect, for example her breasts. The male is designed to be both tender and protector (XY); therefore his attractiveness depends on two factors, his tending value (X) and his keeping value (Y). Which of the two values (X or Y) is more sexually attractive? Well, can a dead man replicate? The answer is no, therefore, a man needs to have “stay alive” value (Y) before he can replicate. To have “tend life” value does not make a man as reproductively attractive (sexy) as having “stay alive” value. This is because first comes staying alive (Y), then nurturing life (X). The woman can nurture life, sometimes even better than the male, for he is a single X, and she is twice that, yet she is unable to protect herself and so she submits to his Y energy to receive the benefits of protection and sometimes benefits of being nurtured too. This same social structure of submission to dominance for the sake of receiving nurturing benefits is seen in the animal kingdom for example, in the behaviour of baboons and their hierarchical structure.

Just as the mating mind in a man calculates the likelihood of multiplication to ensue from an interaction with her, by watching for her (1) willingness/Xness and watching for her (2) Sexiness (fertility), likewise the carnal mind in the woman calculates the likelihood of her survival in the world to ensue/increase from an interaction with a male. It calculates the heart (aggressive/ winner/competitive/ risky personality in the man, which are the most important and consequently the most sexy traits in a man) and the body (the lesser in importance). By observing his behaviour and physique, her mind calculates if he is muscular enough and agile enough to consider mating/bonding with. Important to note that being muscularity extends beyond physical appearance, into the depths of a man’s personality. For it is in his heart that his greatest strength lies, and that is what mating is about, matching up strength and beauty. To envelop a immense strength in disarming beauty.

The female carnal mind also possibly calculates how sexually aggressive the man is and how likely he is to seduce her, this makes him more sexually attractive to her carnal mind, because it increases the likelihood of multiplication ensuing from their interaction. Sexual innuendoes and flirting are subtle communications of sexual power/sexual aggressiveness to a woman. These calculations of survival happen in the mating mind, without the woman’s permission or consciousness. The result of the calculation trigger the release of a feeling in her, and then her conscious mind rationalises why she possibly feels the way she does. ‘my heart beats fast when I see him; I go red when I see him, I keep thinking about him, I think this means I like him’.

Funny isn’t it how the carnal mind in women desires strength in sexual reproduction for reasons mentioned above, yet after sex a man’s strength is drained. The very process of sex takes the honour of youth, which is strength, as the honour of old age is white hair. In a sense, it (sex) drains life from the man and gives to the woman. She replicates this life; a baby is born. It’s not so much “sex” itself which drains energy from the man, it is ejaculation.
In a social setting, the overly muscular men are perceived as strong but not as threats. Any threat to a gender is sexy to the opposite gender. For example if a pretty female were to walk into a room with a couple, the female of the couple would feel threatened by her beauty, and the male would think she’s sexy. Back to the overly muscular men in social settings, you just acknowledge their presence but overlook it and make a mental note not to go near, this is not so with the mid-range man with a chiselled face, broad shoulders, yet a body which is in between skinny and overly muscular. It’s like in the jungle of society; the overly muscular are elephants, the mid are the lions and the skinny are the chickens. The lion isn’t the strongest animal in the jungle yet it’s considered the king, it displays the correct balance between strength, speed, agility and willingness to fight.

5 ways to make him chase you

Hi, thanks to everyone who sends us private messages.

The sender of the message below is a girl, lovely person and just wants to find a man who will want more than sex.

Her question: Okay I need your help I need a way to tell my ex that I figured out he’s the one that I don’t want because he’s talking with that girl that he said he was gonna wait for and not to ask me how I know that but it seems like he just wants me forr ass until she comes since he can’t get it from anybody else and I respect myself and he doesn’t take me seriously so I rather not! How can I tell him in a way that’ll make him think that I’m different? I need your help

Answer: Hey, its so interesting that you seem to have the same problem with your ex as the last guy you spoke about, (not committing to you, waiting for someone else)..

My advice isn’t how you can make him think your different, it seems he doesn’t even know you anyway, what makes you think you aren’t different, everyone is unique, its about finding the right person that will want to know you, that you allow to see the real you, you don’t have to pretend to be different, you are.

Don’t waste your time with him, there are no tricks, ill give you the same advice as with the other guy, forget him until he gives you what you want! He doesn’t deserve to know you, he hasn’t earned it! Leave it satisfied that he hasn’t rejected you because he doesn’t even know who you are!

5 ways to get him

1)Make him chase you, you don’t chase him.
2)Don’t answer his first phone calls, and return 1 in 5 missed calls.
3)Talk to him how you would talk to a guy you’re disinterested in.
4)Agree to meet and then ignore him on the day.
5)Always be the one to end all your interactions.

Keywords: Mixed-Signals, Hot and cold, elusive, Hard to get.

(Caution: If in the middle of playing this game…you give him all what he wants too soon, he may not commit to you)

The trick: The trick is to make him fall in love whilst he’s chasing what he thinks he wants. In the emotional cloud of confusion and desire…he’ll confuse lust for love.

A moment of reflection: Ask yourself, do I really want a man blinded by lust, who professes love to me until he satisfies his lust?

Jeff and Catherine

Making her come with words!

I find it useful to incorporate hypnosis into the process of pleasuring a woman because…a females mind is her biggest sex organ….her body parts are just extras. You can get her extremely turned on and even give her an orgasm without ever touching her!

An orgasm as I define in many of my blogs is “a release of tension” bearing this in mind…look at this interesting definition of what an emotion is “…an emotion occurs when something happens to us which momentarily suspends our reasoning control and we are unable to cope with this event logically”….Also…consider the definition of hysteria from the same source “a state in which one is flooded by uncontrollable emotions, becomes illogical to the point of losing awareness of and contact with his surroundings and sense of reality” [from the book “respect for acting” by Hagen and Frankel]. In previous posts I wrote of a thing called PDR…pre-determined routines…and I spoke of how these PDRs are like the twisting of a rubber band and then letting go- the rubber band untwists automatically to release the tension you created in it by twisting it. Have you ever seen a rubber band untwist? It looks like a woman having an orgasm! It moves uncontrollably! Its as if…it loses control as a way of releasing the effect of the control you exerted on it! Examples of PDRs in human mating behaviour are our responses to “sexual stimulation”…but for better understanding lets call it sexual twisting instead of sexual stimulation because I want you to come to grips with the idea that sexual arousal is like the twisting and untwisting of a rubber band! Its all about that tension created or released!

As you know…the human body has many nerves running through it…these nerves can be seen as a type of rubber band…and if you get on a persons nerves…they can lose “control” and find themselves shouting at you…then say “I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me” or during a crass joke you may find yourself unwillingly laughing at a thing your heart tells you that you shouldn’t laugh at and although you’re conscious of your action of laughter you’re unable to stop it….these are examples of PDRs…A pdr is the bodies pre-programmed corresponding action to a level of tension induced on the mind or body of a being!…An example of an effect that can be caused by a physical action or by words is…Laughter, tickling a person can produce laughter just as jokes can! This principle applies significantly to sex…both words and actions can individually or collectively cause the effect of an orgasm…

Physically or verbally we can trigger peoples pdrs to sexual tension…We can sexually get on peoples nerves…During the beginning stages of seduction I find females playfully telling me that I’m annoying…this is an indicator of the tension creating effect their mind is experiencing…The level of tension i create in them confuses annoys and amuses them at the same time. [Different Levels of tension have different corresponding actions. Its about having the right balance of tension. Tension can make a rubber band untwist uncontrollably…but too much tension can also cause it to snap. But this is another topic…the point is…there is  a type of communication which creates the right balance of tension in her mind. I write about this in XY communication blogs…it’s the mixture of X and Y energy to create things like insulting but humorous comments…or Play-Fighting etc these are a mixture of two different energies…they contrast in nature like the twisting of a rubber band…you twist or pull both ends in opposing directions to create tension…if both ends go in the same direction…no tension is created in the rubber band. This is why “nice guys” often fail to arouse the sexual animal in a woman…they are XX in their communication with little or no Y energy to ruffle her feathers a bit and create tension…read blogs in archive to better understand XY communication].

Ok so…males are most sexually twisted by what they can see (for reasons explained in previous blogs) but females are most sexually twisted by what they can hear (for reasons also explained in previous blogs)…The energies that twist our nerves cause PDRs in our bodies….Pre-determined routines are not just sexual like the hardening of a nipple or moistening of the vagina…they are also things like screaming, crying, and laughter (as mentioned before)…these emotional states once triggered produce their corresponding action without a persons conscious decision to act. When you scream out of pain…or when you notice yourself getting an erection in public…you are aware of what your body is doing but you can’t easily reason your way out of it…its as though your body has its own mind in that moment…Its the tension in you that is controlling the action. If you can control the tension in a situation its very likely you can control the actions of the person you’re exerting the tension upon. Now lets apply this to females….go back to the definition of an emotion.

“an emotion occurs when something happens to us which momentarily suspends our reasoning control”

So we can say “tension occurs when something happens to us which momentarily suspends our reasoning control” because tension is what controls the rubberband to twist until a person lets go of their grip and the rubber band untwists!

We can therefore define Tension as Control. An orgasm can therefore be defined as not the release of tension…but rather the release of Control. She has to be able to let go to really come for you! If tension (the twisting of our nerves) serves to produce emotions like laughter, crying and so on…we can say that an orgasm is in fact an emotion just like these other effects of tension. Its an emotional state just like laughter. Its not some high and mighty experience you only read of in novels and wonder if you could ever give a woman that experience. An orgasm is an emotional effect just like laughter or crying are emotional effects of different states of emotion.

Through hypnosis a person can be put into emotional states. If I can by the use of words cause you to cry…or to become angry or to laugh…then I can…by the use of words cause you to become horny and to have an orgasm…Words and actions can hurt a woman deeply, similarly words not just actions can pleasure deeply…its mind boggling to think that a woman can by words be led into an orgasmic state which men slave with their hands and body parts to bring her to with no avail…Replace the word orgasm from now on with the word release of control. Since an orgasm is an emotion and an orgasmic release is simply a release of control…it’s important that there has to be tension in the situation for her to release (tension is not only built by your words- xy communication but also through constant and random delayed actions which she anticipates- for instance whilst making out allowing your hands to hover over her r-rated zones she’ll anticipate your touch and soon enough begin to crave your touch. Contact releases tension…anticipation of contact builds). Its also important for her to be able to release control to you or to what you’re doing in the situation. So a level of comfort with you before sex will serve to heighten the experience for her and make her more able to let go…which means she’ll more likely come! Which we males desire for some reason to give to females! “The gift of comin”…What guy doesn’t want to make his woman come?! Learn how to touch not just her body but her mind!

Sex is a mind thing for females. Learning to descriptively create scenarios of intense sexual content…(like in the romance/erotica novels so many women read)…is essential…more essential than the size of your manhood. You can make her come with your words!!

Finally lets consider this definition of “hysteria” again…“a state in which one is flooded by uncontrollable emotions, becomes illogical to the point of losing awareness of and contact with his surroundings and sense of reality”….this is the sweet spot! A flooding of uncontrollable emotions surging through her! (lets rephrase it a couple ways so you get what’s truly going on)…

(1)   A flooding of uncontrollable releases surging through her
(2)   A flooding of uncontrollable releases of control surging through her
(3)   A flooding of uncontrollable releases of tension surging through her

…to the point of losing awareness of and contact with her surroundings and sense of reality….At this point your words become her reality….It’s possible and I know because I do it. Creating a state of orgasmic hysteria!

Some tips…For the twisting and untwisting of the sexual rubber band, its important to note that some actions/words “twist” and some “untwist”…Anticipation…twists! Touch…untwists!

Disclaimer: The views expressed in this post are my personal opinion on the subject of sexuality. I do not endorse practising sexual intercourse outside of marriage. I am not a medical professional or a certified psychologists or a professionally trained hypnotherapist so consult a professional before you choose to try any of the things in the post.

I am simply saying that pleasure is an emotional state like laughter

If one can make her laugh, you can make her come. If you can make her angry with words, you can make her horny with words…they are emotional states! The feeling like any minute you might laugh…is like the feeling that any minute you might come…the feeling is the state…the release (either by laughter or by a body shaking orgasm) is the expression of the state!

It’s the exerting of control over her then the commanding of her to release the feeling/tension inside her, thats what this post is about. its the twisting and untwisting of her!

Your language which communicates control to her….twists!

“Open your p*ssy and begin to let go as you become soaked for me”…Language which communicates release….will untwist!

“see me pressing you, strangling you, pushing you up against a wall, pulling your hair” the creation of tension by any means….then…..the release, isn’t that what rough sex is?! So descriptive language can serve to create a mental experience pleasurably equivalent to physical rough sex if not more than!

Twist Key words: biting, holding, firmly gripping, slapping, smacking, pulling, twisting, etc….you get the idea!

Untwist Key words: let go, release, open, flow out, surge through, gush, pour, flood, squirt, “find yourself coming for me! Thats it…come for me…all of it…let go….yes thats it…allow it to happen…good…don’t hold back…give me allow of it…allow all that bottled up sexual energy inside you to spill out of you…you can’t control it…just be aware of it and enjoy it as it happens to you”<< example of talking to her sexually to bring her to a point of release of tension but first you must have created that tension in her!

If she can get wet…she can have a flood!!

I do not endorse sex outside of marriage! But use a condom if you’re having it.

-Jeff Uguru
Dating Secrets

Adventures of Jeff- Turning ON

I have a reputation for going to a town to see a male friend and ending up staying there for a month or longer and being with a different girl every other day. 99% of the time when I meet a female for the first time…we are sexually intimate within a few minutes of chilling…there’s something that happens. I can hardly think of a time I’ve been alone with a female and something sexual hasn’t happened. I’m a laid back guy…I don’t say sweet lines nor do I surprise a female with grand gestures upon meeting her for the first time…and there’s nothing wrong with doing those things. But there’s something that happens when i’m with a girl…and that’s what this post is about…

I don’t force myself upon females…the sexual aggression in the situations I have been in can often emerge from even the most seemingly tender females. All I do is communicate my burning desire to her senses in ways that aren’t overtly sexual…

During many nights with countless numbers of lovers…I have noticed that cuddling up with a girl and simply touching her body in a particular way results in them wanting to have sex…not because they say so but by their body.  The wiggling…the grinding on my crotch area and I can just feel the heat in her body growing and becoming more intense as I touch her…and these touches are not sexual but tender touches.

Here’s the XY explanation for it.

Actions are created by emotions…emotions are created by thoughts…and thoughts are created by observations…the observations we make can either by external or internal: the pictures and voices in our mind or the pictures and voices we see and hear with our external senses. In short…observations are made by our sensory organs. (We don’t have 5 senses…we have 6…the mind is the 6th…it’s like an antenna and it picks up waves…when your mind is set to a particular frequency you’ll find yourself picking up some thoughts that definitely did not originate from you)

The Skin and Touch!!

I touch their skin…that’s my action…its observed by her through her sensory organ (skin) and it creates a thought inside her as she defines what my touch means and then an emotion is consequently created inside her (emotions are chemicals in the body). These chemical fuel the body to do things the consciousness in the body may not voluntarily choose to do…like nipple hardening or vagina moistening and such involuntary actions…she, the consciousness in the body can’t really stop what her bodys doing she can’t help but be aroused…its as though she’s captive to her body and it is taking her on a ride (same thing with guys). In such moments all one can do is to ignore the source of their sexually stimulating observations and they’ll consequently feel differently and the body will correspond accordingly and thus the erect penis lowers, nipple softens etc Point is Emotions create Actions.

We are getting to the SEX part

Chemicals in the body can be divided into X and Y chemicals. X as I always teach is the tender persona and Y is the protector persona. X is the persona a mother tends her child with. And Y is the persona a father protects his family with. X energy is tender in nature and Y energy is aggressive. The sexual make up of a woman is XX and the sexual make up of a man is XY. Adrenaline is an example of a Y chemical. Oxytocin is an example of an X chemical.

Observing Y situations create Y chemicals in the body (an example of a Y situation is a person pulling out a weapon on you). Observing X situations creates X emotions in the body…(example is a person stroking your cheeks tenderly)

X situation is friendly: X persona is the persona for friendship, bonding…etc

Y situation is hostile: Y persona is the defensive, offensive, unfriendly persona used for interacting with sources of potential risk to well-being of person.

When a mother (xx) is tending her baby…oxytocin is released in the body helping her to bond with her child and helping the child to bond with its mother. The mothers X touches cause oxytocin to be released in the babies body…it’s important to specify the type of touch because a Y touch is not the same as an X touch…X energy is tender but Y energy is aggressive and so an aggressive touch from a mother wouldn’t cause oxytocin to be released. It’s the tender, caring, affectionate energy of her touch that causes the release of oxytocin in her child.

What you’ve been waiting for…SEX!!

Oxytocin is released during sex and after an orgasm 5 times as much is produced making for great bonding situations (it’s a fact by experience that men usually get into relationships with females they sleep with easier than with those they haven’t slept with and are trying to win over by dating and buying things for. One could theorize that since oxytocin causes bonding…a woman would be more likely to become bonded or attached to a man after a sexual experience especially when it results in an orgasm…IF he would touch her affectionately after. If not then although oxytocin is present…the bond may not be made…like in the case of infants who are not touched enough by their parents in their vulnerable stage and end up growing to have behavioural problems as adults)

Oxytocin produces a desire to be touched and also to touch. And this is what happens when I’m cuddling with a female touching her in tender, affectionate ways. She desires to touch me. The presence of this chemical in the body also increases the production of testosterone…which is a chemical responsible for sex drive in male and females…and together with the estrogen in women…it creates a desire in the female to be penetrated! Here we see that the old saying of “if you want sex…give her affection” is true! Conversely the saying “if you want affection…give him sex” is also true! Though non of these truths are universal and absolute since love is under no law and can surprise us and break patterns…but generally what happens is that after sexual intimacy there’s a big release and a great bonding mood results between the consenting individuals involved…they usually end up cuddling…Well..a mood is nothing more than a chemical! That chemical of bonding after sex is called Oxytocin. So just like equilibrium reactions or equations…If Sex = Bonding….we can say that Bonding = sex! And thats what happens with me and females when i’m stroking their hair cuddled up! My bonding with them in this non verbal way of touching soon equals sexual intimacy! The mistake men often times make is to get sexual without bonding.

Sweet words can create oxytocin in a woman. Anything which is an X action/word can create this chemical…but…the key is in how the female chooses to define the observation. Now a touch is easier defined…friendly or unfriendly…you just know! But the meaning of words can be lost in translation. You could say “baby you’re beautiful” and she’ll define it as “hi can we have sex?”. Her definition depends on her perception of you…

In any case…a research showed that when married women in good marriages were told to think of their husbands the level of oxytocin in their blood increased! This supports my theory that its not just external observations that can stimulate this chemical but internal ones too.

To use this in a neuro-linguistic programming approach to seduction…one could ask a female to recall times of affection and comfort and bonding and extreme connection! if she’s ever felt a sense of being very loved, very connected to a guy in an incredibly friendly way? etc …A series of such open questions are like X memory seeking missiles and they will lead to X thoughts…and as i mentioned earlier…X observations create oxytocin in her…and also in males…but she’s much more able to create X chemicals as she is XX and the man is only XY…She’s tender tender and he’s tender protector…her body is built and wired for tending and for tenderness…hence she has breast to tend a child with milk and skin twice as sensitive as a mans to receive tender touches in a way that the most sensitive of men could never. And so if his desire to bond after sex is 5 hers is 10! X chemicals abound twice as much in her! And this is also why as she goes into her mind and observes those moments in which she was cared for or loved it will have a stronger influence on her! Also…this is why R&B songs and such are said to get females in the “mood”!

Summary: X observations create X thoughts and that creates X moods and that creates X actions/words…

And Bonding = Her being turned on

-Jeff Uguru

Adventures of Jeff- Kissing and not telling

So I spent the other day with a sexy girl. It was cool. She stayed over…we had Hagen Daz (flavour: strawberry cheesecake) and Pizza (toppings: ham, sweet corn, spicy chicken, Chinese chicken)…watched a movie, the Godfather…

Anyway…a friend of mine came to meet me in the morning (she was still asleep on my chest when he txted to let me know he was coming)…I got up…warmed up something for the girl and I to eat…then I got in the shower!

This was the second girl I’d been with that week. I met her a day after I met the other girl and this was our second time of chilling. So…anyway, my friend comes…I politely try to get her to start heading out soon since my mate was waiting alone for my company. So me and her talked for a bit about my books and stuff…I recommend she borrows one…she complies after jokingly asking what I was insinuating by asking her to borrow a book on dating…(She’s sexy but extremely intelligent and could understand my talks of recent research I’d been doing on Greek letters)…anyway…

[After our pleasant chat she leaves]…I’m now with my mate, he proceeds to asking for details of my night with the girl I just introduced him to. His request was one I couldn’t grant and he knew I wouldn’t because he knows it’s a principle of mine not to kiss and tell especially when the listener knows the girls identity. He (as usual) started going on about how that’s sooo not cool and “come on bruv” and I told him that its about protecting the girls image…if fewer guys talked about their encounters with females then maybe so many girls wouldn’t have “bad names” and be pre-judged and expected to comply to sexual demands. I’ve known guys who have become upset and aggressive with a girl because (they heard) she did so and so with their friend… and they take her refusal to do the same sexual acts with them as an insult.

This post is about developing qualities as a man that protects the image of any female you are in-contact with. I believe girls respect such a guy. Girls talk…but guys don’t have to. I do think sometimes guy talk way too much.

My mindset is: (1) I don’t need the listeners’ approval (2) Protecting a persons image feels better than tarnishing it (3) It makes me feel good about the man I am.

Specifics: I’m not a virgin…but i’ve taken a decision to not have sexual intercourse till I am committed to a girl and I am not committing to a girl till I find “my one”. And the highest level of commitment for me = marriage!

Though my reputation for being seductive precedes me…I am a man of values…my intense sexual nature and expressiveness is governed by two things: LOVE and HONOUR. People should be honoured and treated with consideration.

-Jeff Uguru